Unrealistic expectations of black beauty runs deep in our community. Reading D.H.’s post really pierced my heart. The gorgeous young lady hating her Afro hair. She says she can’t maintain it and that is one of the MANY reasons young black woman hate their hair. It’s because we did not learn how to take proper care of our hair. We have been conditioned to make it straight and keep it straight. Even in this new era of natural hair Afro women, their is still a sense of not being given approval with society. This young lady is definitely a social light and well known in our community. She and many of our young black girls, teens and young adults are constantly comparing their beauty to what they are seeing on social media every day. This is easily destroying the mental state of our young girls. I recommend you beautiful ladies to follow some natural hair accounts. Follow more realistic people on your social media. Trying too keep up with celebrities who wear lace front wigs during the day and remove them and have another to wear the next day is not the life you ladies live every day. The subject of lace front wigs being a protective style is an entire different essay for anther time! Ladies its ok to feel the way you feel. D.H’s feelings are VALID and so are y’all’s reading this. But remember, you don’t have to have natural hair to have healthy hair! Oh lord here comes the relaxer haters!!!! Look, if chemically altering your hair is the lifestyle that will make it easy for you then do it! (There was a point in my life I refused to go natural. Not because I didn’t like my hair or though naturals were not beautiful. It was only because as a hairstylist I knew I did not have time to take care of my curly hair. Maintenance on curly/coily hair is much different than relaxed hair.) But ask yourself am I doing this because I want to or am I doing this to fit in with celebrities I see daily on my phone screen? I pray that self love covers each of you and you begin to nurture the individuality that is in you. And that’s when you will stand out and be free from these celebratory norms.
Tanesha Brown
Beauty and Spiritual Advisor
Cosmetologist
Brown Beauty Complete, LLC
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